Today's Reading from Just For Today © NA World Services


   April 13                                                   People-pleasing

          "...approval-seeking behavior carried us further into our

                                                            Basic Text, p. 14


   When others approve of what we do or say, we feel good;  when they
   disapprove, we feel bad.  Their opinions of us, and how those opinions
   make us feel, can have positive value.   By making us feel good about
   steering a straight course, they encourage us to continue doing so.
   "People-pleasing" is something else entirely.  We "people-please"
   when we do things, right or wrong, solely to gain another person's

   Low self-esteem can make us think we need someone else's approval to
   feel okay about ourselves.  We do whatever we think it will take to make
   them tell us we're okay.   We feel good for awhile.   Then we start
   hurting.  In trying to please another person, we've diminished ourselves
   and our values.  We realize that the approval of others will not fill the
   emptiness inside us.

   The inner satisfaction we seek can be found in doing the right things for
   the right reasons.  We break the people-pleasing cycle when we stop acting
   merely to gain others' approval and start acting on our Higher Power's
   will for us.  When we do, we may be pleasantly surprised to find that the
   people who really count in our lives will approve all the more of our
   behavior.  Most importantly, though, we will approve of ourselves.


   Just for today:  Higher Power, help me live in accordance with spiritual
   principles.  Only then can I approve of myself.